Over five thousand years ago, Moses said to the children of Israel, "Pickup your shovels, mount your asses and camels, and I will lead you to the Promised Land."
Nearly 75 years ago, (when Welfare was introduced) Roosevelt said, "Lay down your shovels, sit on your asses, and light up a Camel, this is the Promised Land."
Today, the Government has stolen your shovel, taxed your asses, raised the price of camels and mortgaged the Promised Land!
I was so depressed last night thinking about BP, Health Care Plans, the Economy, the Wars, lost Jobs, Savings, Cancer, Social Security, Retirement Funds, etc . . . I called a Suicide Hotline. I had to press 1 for English.
I was connected to a call center in Pakistan. I told them I was suicidal.
They got excited and asked if I could drive a truck.
The following compilation are Personal STORIES as well as STORIES, JOKES and QUOTES that I've heard over the years, by my clients, since I've been barbering. Some will make you laugh, some (but not many) will make you cry, while others will make you wonder why this guy doesn’t… ‘get a life.’
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